Insight

What is the meaning of our existence? So far, mine has been to attend an education center, and then I am directed to continue to work through the work at home for a few hours every night. I don't have a job for personal reasons; I want my income to be earned completely independently, I'm a bit of an entrepreneur at heart. So I guess you could say I spend a bit of my constantly receding moments to secure my future through obtaining satisfactory grades and designing business plans.

But why do I do these things? I mean sure, I have the reasons in my head: because I need to earn a salary when I age so I can be comfortable in the confines of a civilization manufactured by other human's hard labor and time. Don't get me wrong, this is a very convenient and cozy alternative to this journey ahead of us. Personally, I want to be nomadic in every aspect. To me, the definition of nomadic can translate over to the mental progression's we've made as a species. I can occupy my time by simply sitting down and thinking for hours on end, constantly being refreshed with new thoughts. Eventually, I'll even come up with a new theory for my existence in there, or craft some sort of story in my head to entertain, or try to mentally grasp the idea of physics and gravity just by my own reasoning. There's just so much to choose from with our brains. Fascinatingly enough, I get to experience a time where I can post those thoughts to hundreds of readers at any given time, truly, a blessing.

The idea of genetics is wild as well, I love imagining all the different combinations that had just an even amount of odds as the ones that happened for me to be here that could have come together. One minor change to the process of DNA formation, one tiny alterjkjjmmation to the designation of the assembly, and my consciousness may not be as it is, and I may not even of had the opportunity to live out this life, being a cognizant human. I've had some rough times through-out life, we all have times of grief at one point or another, all in different intensity, but the small thought of just how and what you are can drastically increase the mood. Then, you throw on the odds of every single event that happened in history that unraveled the perfect butterfly effect for your birth to even happen. Then, you throw on the odds that the Earth was in suitable area for just enough heat for the first microbes to form. Then, you throw on the odds of our star to perfectly arrange at it's co-ordinates in the galaxy. I'll only take the probabilities that far, but you should know it goes on further and further. Just the odds of everything that happened, the placement of every physical body that led to my consciousness coming about.

I really want to keep writing, but I seem to have hit my capacity. I've had an exhausting day and I've had troubles keeping my eyes open while writing this. I'll probably post something tomorrow, I'm feeling it.